Jerry’s Life & Observations

The "Unfiltered" Jerry Kelley

While this guide focuses on the practical "how-to" of stroke recovery, the "who" behind the advice is just as important. Jerry is a man of intense privacy, yet he possesses a unique brand of humor that has remained a constant during the development of this book.

Humor in the Public Eye

Often when traveling together to separate VA appointments, strangers are especially kind—opening doors or moving tables. Vic Campbell likes to keep things light, sometimes telling them, "Don't be too nice... he’ll get used to it," or even jokingly claiming, "He’s not really disabled... he just fakes it for the parking space." It usually earns a shocked look followed by a shared laugh. Jerry has fun with this "dark humor" as well; it’s his way of staying connected to the world without letting it feel sorry for him.

To those who show such kindness, they often hand out a genericvet.com card—a small token of mutual respect for citizens who recognize the challenges of life. Murals at the VA Clinic inspired these.

The "Old Sergeant" and the "Can-Do" Spirit

Jerry is a giver, not a taker. He is generous, though of small means, and exudes a "can-do" attitude that inspires others. His outlook is one of total acceptance: "It is what it is," and "I’ve had my share of good living and have no worries about the end of this life." But make no mistake—Jerry is no pushover. He has strong opinions and expects "positive motion" from those around him. If a home-care helper isn't active or thinks they are "too good" to wash a dish or take out the trash, they might find themselves on the receiving end of some very creative "poetry" from the old sergeant.

A Word to the Caregivers

The home-care industry is a tough, often low-paying field, and many young workers are new to the task. Their time with Jerry can be a "make or break" moment. For those young people putting their ego to the test with an impatient, demanding person in a wheelchair, there is a certain psychology to it. Patience doesn't always grow well in the thin bones of the elderly, but for the helpers who survive it, they leave better for the experience.

Tips for the "Untamed Elder" Professional:  1- Have a good sense of humor. 2-Check your ego at the door.  3- Remember: "Tomorrow is another day."